Thursday, October 29, 2015

Emerged.



The first six months of Coral's life were a haze. A dream-like haze because the lack of sleep and the shiny newness of being of a mom. While sleep-deprived, I was constantly researching what changes she was going through. I soaked up all baby knowledge like a sponge. I wanted to learn, learn and learn. I bought lots of workout clothes because, duh! That's the new mom uniform. I strolled around in my "active wear" with a badge of pride. "I'm a new mom wth no time for frivolous clothes!" is what I would tell myself. I felt like a hamster in a wheel - a very determined hamster. A loopy, happy, tired hamster. 

Then Coral started sleeping through the night and the world started opening back up. Then coral started crawling, holding a bottle, entertaining herself and things got easier again. Still hard, but exponentially easier than the beginning days.  By 12 months I didn't give a hoot about research. I learned to trust my gut. And now, 14 months in, I've started coming back to myself. Well, I came back to myself a few months ago. But I finally feel ready to write again. 

I started working out when Coral was 9 months. Now I'm running. I run 3-4 miles now! I mean that's not a lot for running pros, but this is the most active I've ever been in my life. I've bought real clothes! Workout clothes are great, but yes it's time to dress like an adult again. I'm hitting my stride in the work arena. I'm getting closer and closer to what I really want to do. In fact,  I am en route to Seattle right now for a marketing/ PR/ social media conference.  I'm truly loving my life as a working mama. I can't do it all but I have found balance. 

My former self and new role as a mom have finally found a way to coexist peacefully, when previously, they felt at odds. This is where I am at today and I absolutely love it. I'm inspired today! 

-written from a plane #raganmsft  

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